McNugget Archives - Marco Garcia Photography

DAMN IT ALL TO HELL!!! I ate it!!!

So its done. Three years. Bone dried.

Finished.

I ate it. Three year old. A three year old McDonald’s Chicken McNugget.

Tasted like wood yet it tasted like nothing.

Really…it was fibrous, odd texture, and tasted like I was eating a piece of…well…wood. Really.

McWood?

Oddly the next morning, I have remorse. Charleston Heston remorse. Not for eating it. But the fact that the story is over.

And to no real conclusion. I mean, as some friends pointed out, I’ve put worse down the pipe. Scorpion, worms, dog, canned ravioli, etc…I mean what was the big deal. I’ve eaten meals from dubious origins. Who hasn’t? Hell, ever had one plate lunch? Ever eaten spam? Ho…!

Really…its been had.

Whats to say about McDonald’s and food that’s edible three years down the road? Well, maybe we should watch what we eat. Better yet, when we eat it.

So here’s the original post.

you know what? I’m going to McDonald’s this morning. Nothing like grease and fat to start the day right. I think I’m gonna bring home a new blog piece.

Shoots….is that a pimple? What am I a teen again?

IT’S ALIVE ! ! !

Frankenstein: Look! It’s moving. It’s alive. It’s alive… It’s alive, it’s moving, it’s alive, it’s alive, it’s alive, it’s alive, IT’S ALIVE!

Moritz: Henry, it the name of GOD!

Frankenstein: Oh, in the name of God! Now I know what it feels like to be God!
Dramatic? Indeed but I’ve done it. I’ve reincarnated the McNugget. After an overnight dip in a bath of tap water, a forgetful day in the fridge, the little bastard is back!

It smells like a cold, stale chicken McNugget, the same smell you would think it would have the next day after being in the ‘fridge. The meat looks like it probably would for being in the state it is.

Now here comes the question? Do I eat it? It looks and smells slightly edible. But mind you this is a THREE year old piece of so called food that sat behind the tv for a month then spent years in a ziplock back in my desk. THREE YEARS?

Do I attempt? Do I dare video tape me engaging in something unholy as this? Might I find myself sick?

Hmmm…to ponder for a day.

Would Hamlet have gone to McDonald’s?

Alas, poor Chicken McNugget, I knew him, Horatio: a fellow
of limited taste, of most excellent fat and salt, he hath
borne on his back, that sweet and sour sauce a thousand times, and now, how
abhorred in my imagination it is!

Shakespeare? No…of course not but a pun indeed.

Today I cleaned out an old box and found that little lost McNugget which you’ve read about over the years.

Here is the original post from the McFrankenstein post from 2009. If you remember what made me write about a chicken McNugget is that I found this little bugger a month after I had had McDonald’s after a night of carousing with pals. I recall coming home late and someone being pretty choleric and throwing a bag against the …. er… well … lets move on to the point of this post.

A month after I found this piece of so called food behind the TV, it was in pretty good condition all considering it survived in a tropical climate for a month. I kept it and decided to write about its demise in decay but to our surprise, the little sucker never really did much. It just puckered, hardened and petrified.

Not to dwell on suggestions that McDonald’s is not real food and a McNugget is nothing more than a combination of bi-products of semi digestible, well…you don’t really know what it is. But Its now three years and the shriveled once chicken is someone still edible. I’m going to soak a piece of it in water for a few days to see if it hydrates.

Will I attempt to eat it? Doubtful but I’ve eaten them before and to be honest, I don’t know if there would be a real difference between fresh and three year old vintage.